2.5 years ago, Ian was diagnosed with a rare form of the bleeding disorder, Von Willebrand Disease. We spent hours upon hours sitting and waiting in Hemoc Unit at Children's Hospital. Waiting for Factor, blood to cease flowing from my babies body, waiting, worrying, being very afraid. All while loving and protecting my broken baby and teaching my preschooler not to be afraid and that life is wonderful. I was an angry woman, every trip to that place was like a death march on my soul.
Anger, fear and parenting do not go well together, so I really needed to get myself together.
I did this with my camera and with fabric, floss and beads.
I needed a portable project to keep in our "hospital bag". A small Glad container with lovely floss, fabric and beads fit in perfectly and a small embroidery hoop takes almost no space. I started my black on black project pretty early on. I'm still not finished, and my not be for a while. I do have bitter sweet thoughts woven into this project. Fear, exhaustion, pride, all sewn into one little black squirrel. It may be a while before I complete him, but I pull him out now and then and add a few stitches. It was good to have my hands occupied and something entirely different to think about.
It was my camera that really started the healing. Being behind a camera is like an outer body experience. You can hide right out in the open and see the would around you in a new light. I started photographing everything from hospital days to shopping at my local co-op.
Thankfully, these days are much easier and Ian's own Factor has bumped up a bit, so there are far fewer hospital days. We all breath much easier here and life is as normal as any other household with kids and too many pets. I still carry my camera everywhere I go.
Anger, fear and parenting do not go well together, so I really needed to get myself together.
I did this with my camera and with fabric, floss and beads.
I needed a portable project to keep in our "hospital bag". A small Glad container with lovely floss, fabric and beads fit in perfectly and a small embroidery hoop takes almost no space. I started my black on black project pretty early on. I'm still not finished, and my not be for a while. I do have bitter sweet thoughts woven into this project. Fear, exhaustion, pride, all sewn into one little black squirrel. It may be a while before I complete him, but I pull him out now and then and add a few stitches. It was good to have my hands occupied and something entirely different to think about.
It was my camera that really started the healing. Being behind a camera is like an outer body experience. You can hide right out in the open and see the would around you in a new light. I started photographing everything from hospital days to shopping at my local co-op.
Thankfully, these days are much easier and Ian's own Factor has bumped up a bit, so there are far fewer hospital days. We all breath much easier here and life is as normal as any other household with kids and too many pets. I still carry my camera everywhere I go.
